By Tiffany Deluccia
I found SheIsMore.com a few weeks ago, and I thought you all would enjoy it. The author, Kristen Dalton, is a former Miss USA and great writer. She posted an article entitled “5 Reasons Why Purity Is Powerful” a few weeks ago. Here’s an excerpt, but take a moment to read the whole thing!
I was in a 7th grade bible study when I made the vow to God to save my purity for my husband. I literally wrote it in a letter along with promising to not drink (until I was at least 21), smoke or try drugs and sealed it, addressed to God. Throughout high school and college, people would taunt me and say, “there’s no way you’ll stay a virgin” or “don’t you want to test drive the car before buying it?” “what if you don’t have good sex once you’re married and then you’re trapped?” I thought, are you serious? I’m pretty sure if God has asked me to do something, it’s for a real good reason. Actually, I figured this would be an extremely good way to quickly weed out guys who weren’t husband material.
If a man doesn’t respect and even love your decision to wait until marriage, then he probably ain’t much of a man. It isn’t a good way to start off a relationship by compromising your values in order to get a guy to like or accept you. Sex before marriage is super common and acceptable today, especially since we are desensitized by the constant use of sexuality in the media and ads. But, I have talked to so many peers who say they wish they would have waited, but didn’t have anyone tell them that it was okay or explain the value in it. I believe a lot of heartache, emotional distress, confusion, unplanned pregnancies and diseases could be prevented if young women believed they were worth waiting for their husband. Obviously, this can be a sensitive topic and people are more than welcome to disagree with me. But I want to speak to the young women who haven’t been equipped and informed that being abstinent is cool, beautiful and rewarding. If you have already been sexually active, that’s okay too. It’s never to late to set new standards and be who you want to be.
Here are 5 reasons why Purity is Powerful:
1. It Maintains Wholeness:
When women have sex, a chemical is released in our brains called oxytocin. It is a bonding chemical that makes women want to nurture their babies and stay close. “When it is released during an orgasm, it begins creating an emotional bond — the more sex, the greater the bond.” – Dr. Fisher, people.howstuffworks.com. Therefore, you are literally bonding yourself to that person, which is why women typically get emotionally attached. Think of this chemical has a glue that has glued you to this guy, when they leave you, it’s like ripping off a piece of you. Giving yourself fully to someone is a bigger deal than movies and the common pressure that “everyone else is doing it” makes it seem.
2. It Separates Boys From The Men:
When we are in a relationship, it is important to be able to have clear discernment of his character and how he treats you. Clear discernment and true intimacy can be clouded when sex is involved. Studies have shown that women can confuse sex with love and intimacy while the guy is perceiving things differently. The popular saying is, “women use sex to get love, and men use love to get sex.” This means, that just because he says he loves you or sprinkles you with flattering comments doesn’t mean anything until he is showing you on a consistent basis…without sex involved. Then you can be clear on what his true motives are…
Read more at SheIsMore.com